Could you write that 'A' down on a piece of paper? "Some people are ignorant, they're afraid, they hate anybody and anything that's different. Oh, you're a sore for sight eyes! Laura: Waldo, what's with Steve, he's acting wierd, even for him! Undaunted, Steve switches the station to polka music and ends up having a good time dancing with Waldo and Maxine], Carl: By the way, thanks for letting me use your chamber, Stefan. Laura: Doth thou love me? And I'm sorry. Remember you wished that Steve could find out what's it like to be you. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: DAN DRUFF? She actually said, "Human Being". Laura Lee Winslow: Hey, my locker's open! Willie Fuffner: [Wipes his own mouth] Thank you. No. It seems the guy that you purchased your stereo equipment from didn't want you to fill in any important paper work. It's the closest I'll ever get to marrying you- thats why I wanted you to have this- no strings attached- just the one to my heart. Actor Jaleel White remembers his starring role on the '90s hit sitcom "Family Matters." Harriette Winslow: [feigns being touched] Oh, Carl this is beautiful. There's no one I wanna say no to more than you. Steve Urkel: Uh-oh, Mr.Frostbite. I have feelings. It better be a dead relative in your excuse. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Aww that's cute. [Greg leaves as Willie walks in with Waldo and the crowd boos him. Steve Urkel: Well, isn't that just a FIIIINE kettle of fish? Carl Otis Winslow: You know son, if Screwing Up ever became an Olympic event. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Oh really, why wasn't I told? Steve Urkel: Why? "Tomorrow Dad!" Do these guys have game? Ms. Steuben: [after seeing Waldo's assignment] Waldo, this is superior work. You're grounded for two weeks and you are to stay away from my car until it learns self-defense. Urkel defeats him]. Steve Urkel: I don't have to take this! When the door opens Carl appears dessed up as Steve normally dresses with his glasses]. Was it fair that you stood your father up for bowling? Harriette: I don't know. Carl Otis Winslow: You know you were rude to that guy, Harriette. You dumped one of my relatives in a Hefty bag. Steven Quincy Urkel: [Grabs a blanket and a pillow and heads to the bathroom only to rush back out seconds later] No! He's fanning his hace with a plate as Eddie walks in]. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: I'll bet that's what the bug was thinking, too! [Urkel is playing Danny Boy on his Swiss Melody Chimes and Carl is furiously awaken by it. At the airport he picked up 6 bags. So, what's cookin', good lookin'? Does that about cover it? Seems I'm having all the luck. Carl Otis Winslow: He's trouble. Carl: 3, 2, 1 1, 2, 3 What the heck is bothering me? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Only when we kiss, Laura Lee, only when we kiss [they passionately kiss]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Steve as Stefan] Steve? Harriette Winslow: [pulls up a chair] Sit down, Carl. It was the most terrifying five minutes of my life, second only to watching Lord of the Dance! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well, what are you waiting for? Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [seeing what Laura looks like without sleep] You remind me of a movie star. I'd lay one on you that would weld your glasses to your face. Carl: I'll tell you what's sad Harriette, I've watched two full hours of the "Bridges Of Madison County" and Clint didn't blow up one bridge! Steve Urkel: [singing] Fishing on Lake Wannamuk. In fact, I'm grounded. I never got less than than an A. Steve Urkel: So, I can't live with that! Sorry I'm late, but I got my tongue stuck in the printing press. Steve Urkel: I just called my uncle at the Pentagon. Rachel Crawford: When the paramedics got there, they thought SIXTY-SEVEN people had died! Eddie borrowed money from me. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Yes, those were very confusing times. Carl: You know, bowling was a great idea. Carl Otis Winslow: Yes and that's not all. Laura Lee Winslow: No no no, a GEEK party, as in nerd, doofus. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Well it wasn't funny. Steve Urkel: Carl, I brought the notes to go over with Laura. Rachel Crawford: Well, I'm planning dinner for a very, very special friend. Rachel Crawford: Uh, Steve, would you mind coming over to the restaurant on Sunday at about 7:30? Chuck is twice the man, Raoul is. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Oh great, I'm gonna lose my toes. Harriette Winslow: I know. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: These last 2 weeks have been wonderful for me. I got a nosebleed at birth. Steve Urkel: Well, that may be what happened, but it won't be what the people believe. Carl: There is a guy on our couch who says I remember him, but I don't remember him. You think she'll really kiss Steve? urkel-steve. [takes note and crumbles it, Laura slams locker door, revealing the word 'N*gger' spray painted on it]. Muskrat Time! I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. "I'm Asian, so I'll eat your cat." 2. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Bright side? Now, I may have taken a sip of my mom's coffee, but I Chain: I'm talkin' about the other kind of wired! Steve Urkel: Well, it starts out with a little cough. Steve Urkel: A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. Harriette Winslow: Carl, calm down, it's not the school's fault. Wha? Where did you get the money for this? Laura Lee Winslow: Then she demanded her money back when she found out that she modeled ladies underwear. Steve Urkel: I've taken a vow of chastity. Steve Urkel: King me. I don't *ever* want to work for you again. Curtis: My whole family is flying out to Washington for the funeral, Laura: Can you wait a day, of course you can't. Laura: Let's eat everything and see if he can take a joke! I'll take this up later with the Lieutenant. The black kids won't talk to the white kids, people are calling each other names, taking sides! Harriette: [Reading] Swiss Family Robinson! We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Carl: [in an Urkel like voice and gives Stefan some money] Here takes some casher rooney and fix it sooney. Once, I found them in Milwaukee living under an assumed name! Carl Otis Winslow: Ohohoho and they are personal and private. Rachel Crawford: [to Harriette] He's not gonna make him quack. Let's just get there! Harriette Winslow: What's wrong with that? Maxine Johnson: Yeah and poor you, you gonna miss your prom. [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the next name]. Rachel Crawford: It's okay, Steve. *You're* gonna sleep in the bathtub! I love this lady [Laura] and I can come over here anytime I want to and you can't stop me! During the class picture, you don't have to sit with the girls in the front row and hold up the class. Well it's not cool. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: [not knowing Steve and Laura saw each other naked] All right, chicken. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Laura, do you mind if your old grandmother tells you a story? Eddie: I don't believe wat just happened, dad took Waldo to the bulls game. [Laura has stuffed her bra with Eddie's socks], Steve Urkel: [entering] Hi gang! "Family Matters Quotes." Oh my God! Carl Otis Winslow: Well there's no rush. That's Lt. Murtaugh. It can't explode or anything? The only reason I asked you to be my partner was because I was worried about my grade. Steve Urkel: I have a lot of personal experience in first aid. I can't afford a B on my permanent record. Carl Otis Winslow: Why not try the truth! [Eddie comes crashing through the living room in the car], [Stefan did not take his "cool boost" for that week - he wants to turn back into Steve]. Trying to cover it up only make things worse. Family Matters is an American sitcom series that originated on ABC from September 22, 1989 to May 9, 1997, before moving to CBS from September 19, 1997 to July 17, 1998. [just got lemon tart filling thrown at him]. In Season 1 he was a supporting character and made his first appearance as a background character in Rachel's First Date and had his first major role in "Laura's First Date", however as of Season 2 he was officially considered a main character . Harriette Winslow: No, Carl let's call it what it really is, Cheap and Lazy. Laura: She didn't need a hairstylist, she needs a fairy godmother! Wha? At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Ooh, that's nice! Steve Urkel: Hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, hi Laura, hi Harriette, oh look, it's Laura! Laura: Maybe not, there has to be some guy who doesn't have a date. I just wish it would all go away, Daddy. He's gonna drive us tonight. Waldo Geraldo Faldo, Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Cheating? Laura Lee Winslow: [Yelling at Judy who's trying to shove her plate in front of Eddie dishing food] Can you wait? Harriette Winslow: You were gone for three hours. He is portrayed by Jaleel White. Then we par-tay, see no problem. Self respect. Every year, my relatives send me money in hopes that I won't visit them! Ok, just give me a couple of days and I sould have it fixed. And you taught Cassie Lynn Nubbles, the posterchild for useless people, how to do things for herself. He finished his Christmas shopping weeks ago and never asked me for a penny. And you got LOUDER every time you made the Maitre D move us to another table. Carl Otis Winslow: Hey, I mean every word, sweetheart. Me and the guys were going to have a flyer party next Saturday when you go out of town. Laura Lee Winslow: One of them is my best friend. Steve Urkel: You mean, you want to kiss me? It meant a lot to me. Harriette Winslow: Well, Eddie said something came up, but he promised he'd empty the trash tomorrow. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: That's one month longer than they taught it to me. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: From my stay away fund- every year all my relatives send me money and hope that I won't visit them. And the reason it hurts is because I've tried very hard to be your friend and all you've done is take advantage of me. Bazooms! [Waldo nods as Eddie goes to the last one]. Carl Otis Winslow: What did she have to say? Rachel Crawford: She keeled over leading a game of Simon says! Eddie: No, grandma. And from that day on, EVERYBODY could use that library. You have a lot of qualitites girls really go for. Carl Otis Winslow: Well guess what Harriet, it's not empty. Judy: Were all of Dad's friends named Darnelle? Five hundred on the line. Harriette Winslow: [gives him a tray of drinks] Here, take these with you. [faints]. Because, I already told him I do remember him. People stopped and starred, called me names, and some even spit at me. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Hey Steve, Was'sup? Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. Steve Urkel: And lose that wonderful ocean flavor? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Carl and his father planned on doing a lot of things together, but they never got the chance. the signs as potential pick up lines from hamilton. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: All right. Laura: We're not going anywhere. Laura Lee Winslow: I don't know, and quite frankly, I'm tired of thinking about it. Steven Quincy Urkel: Don't interrupt me! I met Raoul. Eddie: As a starting forward of the school team, it's my duty to play round ball not nerd ball. April 24th, Carl, I planted this fake diary because I knew you'd read it. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: But you humilate me everyday. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Cheating is wrong, Eddie, and you should know that. Waldo: I'm sorry, Steve. That's why here I have compiled the sexiest and smart pick up lines to use on guys to make them interested in you! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I almost wore that same suit. I may get a B. Laura: Dad, this is serious. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: When you're hurting other people it ain't harmless. Carl Otis Winslow: He and Steve got busted for gambling. Judy Winslow: Brussels sprouts make me wanna puke. Steve is the perfect son. Cop: It's also against the law. Rachel Crawford: Mother Winslow, when you when you Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Bite the big one? You can stay. [Handing out] Menu, menu, menu, menu, menu. What is the value of X? Laura Lee Winslow: Nope, this is Black History Month. Rachel Crawford: Honey, how long were you in there? Steve Urkel: Well, what if you trip or something? Steven Quincy Urkel: I'm not through! Urkel, the camera was on Eddie the whole time. Harriette Winslow: Now let me get this straight. Anywhere away from my Laura. Carl Otis Winslow: Better, I locked him up. Steve Urkel: Well the good news is, my dad will do the operation for you. So long! Steve Urkel: Laura, suppose I arrange for you to meet Johnny Gill personally. Ms. Steuben: That's that's not funny, Steven. Carl Otis Winslow: Hey, I'm here for you, baby. This could be an emergency and I'm not even dressed yet! Carl Otis Winslow: I'll get that, you must be having a rough day. Harriette: [unsympathetic] Yes! Lionel: Really? [opens fire at Urkelbot who catches all the rounds in his hand], Urkelbot: [Urkelbot walks up to the robber and drops the bullets on the floor before lifting the robber off the floor with one hand], Urkelbot: [Terminator Impression] Hasta la vista, baby! If you were a vegetable, you'd be a 'cute-cumber.'. Laura Lee Winslow: If you're really my guardian angel, where're your wings and your harp? You're wrong, the maitre'd gave me a two for one coupon. When I was born when the doctor slapped me, I SHOT him! It meant a lot to me. White, known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom "Family Matters," is. [Waldo and Maxine are dancing to R&B music and professing their love for each other. Alex Phillips: How 'bout you put your money where your mouth is. You need to get out more. So, is it all right with you? Midway through the first season, the show introduced the Winslows' nerdy neighbor Steve Urkel (Jaleel White), who quickly became its breakout character and eventually the show's main character. Carl Otis Winslow: Well sweetheart, if you feel that strongly about it, maybe you should do something about it. Sorry. [laughs]. Why, I guarantee you he has studied the best! But, it's only a compliment and it doesn't mean anything more than that. I wanna take it home and read it to my mom. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [last lines of the series] Do I get a welcome home kiss? Steve Urkel: Well, Laura, do you realize what you're asking? Larry Csonka: Yes, spread the word. Steve Urkel: [last lines of the series] Do I get a welcome home kiss? Now you're going to find out what it's like to be Steve Urkel. Harriette Winslow: [Waldo crashes his snowmobile in the Winslows' living room] Waldo? Your father waited at the Box Office for an hour. Have you taken leave of your senses? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Way to go Carl! Steve Urkel: Well, look at his poor, pathetic face. And most of all, you don't have to deal with bullies. They just love juicy gossip. Carl Otis Winslow: Edward, why can't you manage money like your brother, Steve? Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: That's big talk coming from a guy in Italy. This is fantastic! Carl Otis Winslow: [kisses the ice cream carton] Goodbye. Easy Eddo. I can see my dad! You know what? He opted ofr early retirement. Carl Otis Winslow: Might have. Laura: That you'll never go into outer space again, Steve Urkel: Only when we kiss, Laura Lee, only when we kiss [they passionately kiss]. I can't even tell her it won't ever happen again! [the car breaks down. Carl's first word was Donut. I won't be able to take you to the prom. Gun, Carl. You're late for class. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Big Guy, what are you up? Carl Otis Winslow: I understand that. Rachel Crawford: The balcony scene is next. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What the heck is wrong with you? Steve who? Steve Urkel: I know! Steve Urkel: Well, I didn't have one. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: I'll have you know, I'm not in Italy. Well, name a couple. Steve Urkel: Boyd whipped Eddie. Laura: There's an Urkel in our defense department? Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I was steamed, I didn't want to do something I'll regret. Laura: Ma, the package said to cook it at 275 for 20 minutes. And instead of admitting to it, you got yourself involved in gambling. The Nineties. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: What're you so happy about? Harriette Winslow: [Rachel carries on about how sad it is Aunt Clotilda died] She was 94 years old. Okay, first question. Carl enters her room with Eddie, who is struggling to stifle his laughter.]. Steve Urkel: Well, if I did, nobody would ever let me in. Steve Urkel: Yeah, but now I have an excuse. Judy Winslow: Mom, when's dinner? often referred to simply by his surname, Urkel, is the main protagonist of Family Matters. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Waldo come to the Witness Stand. White . Pick-up lines get a bad rap for being cheesy and cringe-worthy, but if you start your conversation with the right dose of interest and humor, you may end up scoring a date or a number. How would you like it if I put Jheri Curl in your deodorant? When's it going to end? There's room for you and there's room for me although let's be quite honest, you take up a lot more room than me. Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, I just feel so helpless! Carl Otis Winslow: Thanks for the present son. The hot chocolate will be ready soon. Harriette: Judy, finish your Brussels sprouts. But our little town only had ONE library, and it was for whites only. Got anything in the fridge? You've been saying it for weeks. Carl Otis Winslow: Yes, Harriette! Rachel Crawford: It's almost impossible to find a job these days. Steve Urkel: So, you used me! Robbins: Hey everyone, Laura Winslow's date is Steve Urkel. There's a lot of bad pickup lines out there. Three times X equals six. [Pulls him into a hug]. Steve Urkel: Oh great! YOU'RE WHERE? Halawna, Oneisha: [pop up in the car Clarence stole] Surprise! Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: [told he can't go to the party] You mean I was nice for nothing? Then he unfolds it] Well Tell me again. In the latter half of Family Matters, Steve started staying with the Winslows as his parents didn't want him around. Carl Otis Winslow: Alright Harriette, you were a liiiiiiiittle abrasive tonight. And, he's got something that he didn't have before. I'll just begin a rigorist-training schedule. I'm Stefan sweet thing. Waldo Faldo from Illinois. And it will also think of a range of mistakes, not just the standard fare of stats guys everywhere: the disastrous trade up. The Urkel mock will think bigger in potential screw-ups for teams that have valued assets poorly in the past than for teams that have made few mistakes. Carl Otis Winslow: Don't get cute with me Harriet. Waldo: We rented us a limo station wagon. Carl Otis Winslow: Well yeah. Steve Urkel: Hi Laura, my little sweet potata! Stefan Urkelle: Not I know that's not Carl. I'm on duty? Bushwhacker Luke: 'Cause they couldn't catch her till then! Steven Quincy Urkel: Oh, put a cork in it, Missy! Steve Urkel: I hurt myself. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It was on his tongue! It helps to determine how much help you need. Carl: Well, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you in front of a guy named Weasel. Harriette: This feud between you and Nick is getting out of control. The truth is you deserve a kiss. I wouldn't know what to charge. Stefan and Myra of left stunned]. Harriette Winslow: Now let's hit the sack. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura, I know that I'm not worthy of you, but I just can't help loving you. Everywhere you look, TV, movies, magazines, all these 90 pound people, smiling, dancing where do they get the strength? And, I just wanted to wish you good luck. [Harriette laughs as Laura leaves the living room to help Mother Winslow get ready]. I'm wearing a Bart Simpson's mug. Now I know, I'm not worthy of you- but I love you more now then I did then- Laura Lee Winslow- will you marry me? [Eddie has just realized his mistake in standing his father for the chance to go out on his date with a girl that he likes]. Addeddate 2019-09-04 04:56:23 Identifier steveurkel_201909 Scanner Internet Archive HTML5 Uploader 1.6.4. plus-circle Add Review.
. Rachel Crawford: I'll just take your word for it. [Waldo has just given Eddie a list of IOU at Mighty Weenie].